![[Menu Bar]](http://eur.yimg.com/i/uk/g/main3.gif)
We were interested to read this week that the average adult of 72 will have spent more than 11 years glazed and semi-comatose in front of a television set (the equivalent of watching 192,816 episodes of Eastenders, if you want a horrifying comparison). The same report also claimed that more than 4,000 studies have now been carried out into the effect of television on the human psyche in America alone. The moral is clear: If we all watched less TV there would be a lot more unemployed academics out on the street causing trouble with their clipboards.
So, in a bid to stop the country being overrun by hordes of starving statisticians we recommend you increase the amount of audiovisual equipment in your home. You can do this by visiting Granada Home Technology -- a site that allows you to buy or rent televisions and videos without the boring necessity of actually leaving your house. You can browse their full product range, select from a range of payment options, and take advantage of a special offer only available to surfers. The best feature of all, however, is the jargon buster -- a neat glossary of all the technical terms salesmen dream up to leave you, the consumer, quaking like a rabbit caught in a car’s headlights. One word of warning: the bright colours and flashing graphics throughout the site give it a jaunty air -- but on no account should you go anywhere near it if you are suffering from a hangover!
Our own study into television watching habits (conducted in our living rooms over more years than we care to remember) has revealed one unassailable fact -- the more channels you have at your disposal, the less there is actually worth watching. So web sites that help sort the wheat from the chaff are valuable additions to any pre-millennial home. Which is why we liked The Sitcom Pages -- a labour of love and a guide to all the best American comedy shows currently airing in the UK. Each show -- and there are currently 20 of them -- comes complete with episode guides, cast lists and special features.
Anyway, while we were assimilating the vital fact that in Episode 39 of series 2 of Caroline in the City the part of Stu is played by the guy who stars as the bewildered alien in Third Rock From the Sun, we realised that we probably should get out more. Or at least sue someone. Unfortunately Lawrights, currently our favourite legal site, was of little help. It does provide comprehensive guides to most legal problems, however. It also offers helpful tips for when you’re looking for a solicitor, information on how to obtain legal aid, and guides to books on law. If you want a case pursued on your behalf you can leave details on the law contact page.
There are those who claim that lawyers are a breed apart. It would be unreasonable to assume that this means that they marry their relatives, live in swamps and eat their own offspring -- though that is a description that could be applied literally to the 18th century Scottish robber and cave-dweller Sawney Beane. According to historians Beane did all of these things. You can just imagine him coming home after a hard day’s robbing, sitting down at the dinner table and complaining: "Oh no! Not baked Beanes on toast again!". He was an altogether less savoury character than that other great Scottish legend, The Loch Ness Monster, which features in The Imprint Guide to Loch Ness. Packed with local information, and put together by two people who live on the shores of what is reputed to be the largest body of fresh water in the world, this is a fine site for anyone who has been to the area or who is thinking of going in the near future.
Finally we have, on the back of a particularly heavy night out, decided only to drink non-fermented liquids and eat nothing that ever breathed, swam, laid an egg or ate grass. We anticipate spending a lot of time in The Vegan Village, a site put together for and by Vegans. The first thing you notice is that Veganism isn’t merely a diet -- it’s a way of life. The site offers hints on Vegan holidays, services (including a vegan solicitor), clothes, gift ideas and even toiletries.
Before we go we’d like you to consider the following. At 72-years-old we’ll have spent 11 years watching TV. Another 36 of those years will have been spent in darkness and asleep, or traveling to and from work and other important stuff. It also took us 18 years to attain our majority. This all adds up to 65 years, thus leaving only 7 years for work. Now, by our calculation we’ve already done that and then some, so we’re going to down tools, and put our feet up in front of the telly. We might return next week if there’s nothing good on.